“Conquer fear!” “Overcome Fear!”  “No Fear!”

It feels like the impossible battle cry doesn't it? Lets flip the lens around for a minute. Maybe we're being a little too harsh on fear.

Is there a better alternative than constantly thinking of fear as an enemy to be destroyed or overcome?

I don't think the problem is that we experience fear. The problem is, we're not in the habit of utilizing fear as an asset or tool that can be useful when needed, and set aside when its not.

We too often put fear to work in situations where it's not serving our current need. It's often like using a cannon to cut a wedding cake. Messy!

We would be well served in remembering that there are only TWO fears that we are actually born with. The fear of falling, and the fear of loud noises. All of our other fears come from things we've “learned.” And you already know that everything we “learn” isn't necessarily true.

What would happen if we decided to be a little more selective about how we're going to use fear.

What if we decided we're only going to use fear for our own benefit? After all, it is our emotion. We own it!

Instead of running from it, or trying to smash it, shouldn't we learn to just…use it? Like a tool.

After all, tools can be very helpful…when used appropriately.

#1 Fear Thins Out the Competition

Have you ever thought of asking for a raise, asking someone on a date, starting a business, but were afraid to take action? Here's the deal, fear already thinned out the competition for you!

There are plenty of people who are attracted to the same person you are, want the same raise, or are interested in the same type of business venture that you are. But they won't take any action because fear has stopped them in their tracks.

It's for this very reason that you SHOULD decide what it is you want in your life, position yourself to be successful, and go for it. Reap the benefits of the fact that most of the “herd” runs from imaginary danger, but you're bolder than that.

Be the employee that is the difference-maker and deserves the raise, do the legwork to create a viable business plan, be the person who puts others first and attracts love and appreciation into their life, then go for it.

#2 Fear can promote objective thinking

We often don't realize how often fear raises it's little head in our everyday life and camouflages itself as something else. Stress, anxiety, intolerance, jealousy, envy …all just byproducts of fear.

Fear that we'll be late for work, fear that we'll lose a connection with a loved one, fear that we'll fail at something, fear that the beliefs of someone else threatens our own.

What if we got into the habit of thinking objectively about what outcome, specifically, we're afraid of?

For example:

• What will happen, specifically, if you're late for work? Can you avoid being late in the future?
• What if you're significant other has an admirer? Do you trust them? If so, be flattered that you have such an attractive partner.
• What if your business venture doesn't immediately succeed? Have you modeled the success of other similar businesses? Can you restructure your business model, using what you've learned, to succeed?

The point is, we can use that initial emotion of fear as a trigger for us to focus directly on the root of the issue.

We can then either take action to fix a legitimate concern, or realize that there is nothing to be concerned about.

#3 Quality Fears are Necessary

What is a quality fear? Oh, lets say your walking on your favorite trail in the woods and spot a bear. The old adage of “No Fear” may prompt you to try to hug the big fella because he's so cute and fluffy.

This is not recommended. A fear of randomly hugging bears in the woods is a quality fear, plus, it's not nice to scare bears like that.

However, the fear of pursuing our dreams, goals and desires is not a quality fear.

It just diminishes us. It sets us up for a life full of regrets and missed opportunities. We deserve better than that.

#4 Fear can be Exhilarating!

What good is a roller coaster, scary movie, skydiving or rapids adventure without FEAR? Living life in while telling fear to move-the-heck-outta-the-way makes us feel ALIVE!

If we KNEW we would succeed at every single thing we tried in our life, things would quickly get boring.

Fear dares us to stretch, to reach beyond what many think is impossible. When we defy our fears, we get stronger.

We look past the see-able horizon, surge beyond today's boundaries, and create new ones for ourselves.

Live a full life. There are no real wins when there's no fear of losing.

You don't have to “conquer” fear.

Fear can just be that overly-protective friend that you only listen to when necessary.

We’ll chat soon — Until then, I’ll be cheering you on.